At Gonju we stayed at a traditional Hanok village - very picturesque, beautiful buildings and futons to sleep on - but more about that later. When we arrived we got to meet our translator DaHye and the family that we where matched with for the event - the Cho family. DaHye is a senior at secondary school who was majoring in English and English literature and wants to works as a translator. She was really sweet and very quiet.
The Cho family - Dad (JoongKee), Mum (HyeYeong), eldest daughter (YeonSoo) and youngest daughter (YeonJin). YeonSoo is their birth daughter and is 26 and YeonJin is their adoptive daughter and is 8 and joined their family when she was 2. I am not quite sure how ESWS did the matching but they did a great job of pairing us as both of our families are fairly quiet and tend to be very ordered and methodical.
We had a massive lunch together - the food just seemed to keep coming. JoongKee and DaHye did a great job of telling us what we were eating throughout the meal (and for the grandparents information - there was no Korean sausage!). Mrs Kim, who is the director of the agency opened the event before we began a series of activities including T-Shirt painting, which allowed us to get to know each other and to decide what our group was going to be called - Kimchi and Kangaroos; we also dressed in traditional costumes and did some beautiful Korean paper tray art.
We had time to check into our rooms before heading over the the BBQs where the fathers were to show us 'their cooking nature'. Unfortunately Mr Cho had to head back to Seoul for work - which left Ian in charge of the BBQ - ably assisted by YeonSoo. Our one activity after tea was called Talk Time - where, with the assistance of and ESWS social worker, we had the chance to share our story with the Cho family - and they got to share theirs. Kim and YeonJin opted to be outside with the kids - who were supervised by the translators, but Han came in and joined in.
This was the most moving part of the event. Listening to Mrs Cho talking about the difficulties they experience with having an adopted child in a society that does not really support it made us realise that our journey is actually easier in many ways. We cannot hide that our boys are adopted - not that we would want to - but the fact that we look different to the boys means that explaining adoption to them is in some ways easier and more easily accepted. The large gap in age between YeonSoo and YeonJin makes it even more complicated and added to that YeonSoo is not adopted - so there is added pressure from YeonJin about who is more loved. Mrs Cho was grateful to be able to ask Han about how he felt about being adopted which in many ways reassured her that as YeonJin gets older her current feelings about being adopted will change. Han made us very proud as he shared his thoughts on being adopted.
After tea we opted to call it a night whilst others headed off to the night market - but given it was already 9.30 we felt that by the time they got organised and went to the market and then came back it would be very late (which it was according to some who did go). Instead we went to our room - made up our futons and settled in for sleep. Unfortunately sleeping on a futon on the floor did not really work for me so this morning I had to take lots of painkillers and needed to ease my poor aching back into the world again. The boys however all slept well.
Today we shared breakfast - with more chances to chat and share with each other before walking to Muryeong Tombs and the Gongju Fortress. The Baekje festival was on so the streets of Gonju were filled with street stalls and the gardens had been specially planted for the event. It was a lovely morning - having the chance to see another part of Korea that we had not expected to see. After another scrumptious lunch - boy does ESWS know how to feed a group of people - we were brought back to ESWS by bus, said our goodbyes and collapsed upstairs in our room.
One other very special person that we got to meet at the event was Heather - a Korean adoptee herself who brought her son Zachary along. Heather was adopted in 1976 to an American family and normally lives in Chicago but at the moment is living in Korea with her husband (and daughter Sam) as he is with the army and is currently stationed in Seoul. It was lovely to spend time talking to her, to get her perspective on being adopted, and for the boys to see someone who is an adult who is accepting of their adoption. Heather has recently found her birth family and is spending time getting to know them whilst living here.
And so - the day has now come to an end. We have been in to Namdaemun Market this evening - for some street food and shopping. It has been a busy and exhausting two days - but very very special.
The Hanok village.
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